Through The Lens Thursday: Twisted

posted in: Photography, Through The Lens Thursday 14 comments

Through The Lens Thursday is a one-year photography project (now in its second year), where every week, my project partner, Greta of GFunkified and I, will post a picture (or pictures) we have taken based on a prompt. Our hope is that together, we can teach and learn from each other, stay accountable to our goal of improving our skills, and hopefully, be taking some gorgeous photographs. 

A photography project

 This week’s prompt is Twisted.

TTLT - Twisted 1

Twisted wires and cables

 

This week, one of my writing goals, that is to be published in On Parenting from The Washington Post, was met. I wrote about a topic that I’ve been thinking about for a few years, especially so since I started blogging in 2011 – it’s about how our online actions as parents, may (or may not) affect our children in the future. This is especially so if we write about our parenting experiences, and share stories and photographs of our children on blogs, other websites, and social media. 

I knew that this topic would cause discussion and disagreement, but not vitriol. I felt like my words were twisted.

TTLT - Twisted 2

Under my husband’s desk. Drives. Me. Nuts.

 

There were a couple of commenters who wrote that they thought I was merely a navel-gazing, attention-seeking hypocrite, writing about my “made-up dilemma”, and pretending to “wring my hands” over it. What’s there to wonder over, they say, just stop sharing their stories and photos. Then they went on to bash mommy bloggers (a term I refuse to assign negativity to, despite how the Internet world in general uses it). 

Everyone says, “don’t read the comments”, and they are right. I have said that myself to others. I definitely did stop reading comments on my vaccination post at Scary Mommy, because good lord, that was poisonous. But I did read the comments on my article on Washington Post, because some lovely friends shared their thoughtful opinions on this topic (it is nice to know that I am not alone in how I feel). 

I am hurt by the comments, because hey, I do have feelings. It also made me question whether these commenters were right.

However, my friends reminded me that my opinions are valid. 

These commenters twisted my meaning and intentions, as they are well within their rights to. 

As I am well within my right to continue to write my truth.

Next week’s prompt is Words.

For the full list of prompts, check out my Through The Lens Thursday page. If you’d like to join Greta and I, but not necessarily blog your picture, join our Flickr group, where we upload our photos, and give comments, or helpful critique on each other’s photographs.

Alison
Alison Lee is a former PR and marketing professional turned work-at-home mother. After a 10-year career in various PR agencies, and of the world’s biggest sports brands, Alison traded in product launches and world travel, for sippy cups, diapers, and breastfeeding. Alison's writing has been featured on Mamalode, On Parenting at The Washington Post, The Huffington Post, Everyday Family, Scary Mommy, and DrGreene.com. She is one of 35 essayists in the anthology, My Other Ex: Women’s True Stories of Leaving and Losing Friends. In 2012, she founded Little Love Media, a social media consultancy specializing in blog book tours, and because she doesn’t sleep, is an editor at BonBon Break, an online magazine. Alison lives in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia with her husband and four children (two boys and boy/ girl twins).
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  • February 19, 2015 Allie

    The hate spewed in the comments on those big posts never ceases to amaze me. I stopped reading them as well because I wanted to just scream at all of them YOU DON’T KNOW THE FISRT THING ABOUT ALISON!!! And that’s just it. They don’t know you or what your blog is all about or how much you truly love your kids. After that occurred to me, I felt much better and you should too. It’s a dream of mine to be published somewhere as amazing as The Washington Post. I would focus on that and not the negativity – although I know it must be hard. Just know you have a whole support system here and we know you and love you and your writing!
    Allie recently wrote…40 Until 40 Update: The First Seven Days of LessMy Profile

  • February 19, 2015 Kimberly

    You’re a good mom Alison.
    I read the comments and I felt that they were absolutely ridiculous – I honestly feel that some people have nothing better to do than to troll the internet and find something to blow up on.
    I felt that the article in no way read as if it would spur discussions on disagreements. I think deep down, we all have that fear. If anything, I thought that it would have opened the floor for discussions on how to protect our children etc…not that.
    It’s a new day Alison.
    xoxo
    Kimberly recently wrote…Find Me HereMy Profile

  • February 19, 2015 Tove Maren

    haters will hate… always… they will FIND a way to twist and turn your words. Just thank GOD that you don’t have to share a Thanksgiving Day meal with those demented and sad souls. Be thankful that you have such a strong following of happy and uplifting MOMMY BLOGGERS who love you. Leave all the negative nellys to play their own game of (word) Twister!

    We love you!
    Tove Maren recently wrote…Help Your Baby Sleep Longer & Self-Soothe – Without TearsMy Profile

  • February 19, 2015 Tamara

    I read the post, but not the comments. I am amazed at how defensive people get by posts sometimes. You could talk about the color green and they’d freak out that their kids love the color green and how could you say anything about it?
    Pretty much.
    And I imagine that no one who reads you regularly or knows you in person thinks anything like that. Right?
    I like Twisted! It looks like right behind my computer right now.
    Tamara recently wrote…Is This The Real Life Or Just Fantasy?My Profile

  • February 19, 2015 Greta

    Ohhh, good prompt usage, my friend! I have several areas of the house that look like that.

    Don’t let the haters get you down. I’m proud of you for putting yourself out there over and over. You’re brave and I know you can take it.
    Greta recently wrote…Through the Lens Thursday: TwistedMy Profile

  • February 20, 2015 Clare

    I like your twisty wires! I don’t like that there are always people almost waiting to jump in and throw a bunch of unresearched negativity at anything and anyone.
    Be proud that you met your goal to be published by the Washington Post. Onwards and upwards x
    Clare recently wrote…Through the Lens Thursday #8 TwistedMy Profile

  • February 20, 2015 Rudri Bhatt Patel

    Congratulations, Alison! I read your piece, but didn’t peruse the comment section. You know what? Keep on, keeping on, because no matter what side of the debate you choose, there will be certain people who will continue spreading their negative energy.
    Rudri Bhatt Patel recently wrote…You Do Not Have to Be GoodMy Profile

  • February 20, 2015 Rorybore

    I will have to hop on over and read the article and *sigh* the comments to get an understanding. but one of the quotes I used in my photo post today might just be well timed. “it’s all grist for the writing mill.” 🙂

    And omg — the wires!! holy mess of wires. I don’t know how my husband figures any of that twisted mess out: but he knows. drives me crazy though. but, can’t argue that it made a great shot! 🙂
    Rorybore recently wrote…Through the Lens: Love TwistedMy Profile

  • February 20, 2015 AwesomelyOZ

    Haters gon’ hate, it’s hard not to let them get to you but they’re not worth your BP getting raised. You completed an impressive and wonderful task being published on Washington Post, focus on that and let the rest go. Love the image, it’s wonderful and captures this post well. Especially since it’s computer wires! Take Care Alison -Iva
    AwesomelyOZ recently wrote…A Libster and a Very Inspirational PostMy Profile

  • February 20, 2015 Bev

    I like how you used this week’s prompt to visualize your feelings. I’m sorry to hear how people twisted your words around. I thought your post was very eloquent and thought-provoking and it’s something I also grapple with.
    Bev recently wrote…We can all be a model for compassion #1000SpeakMy Profile

  • February 21, 2015 My Inner Chick

    —-Dear, Alison Lee.
    One of the reason you are read & appreciated is because you put controversial content out there.

    The thing I can’t understand is the venomous comments people type afterwards.

    Is it because they are not heard? Is it because they feel safe behind their computers? Is it because they need to feel validated in their personal lives?

    Whatever the reason, I despise meanness. I just f*cking despise it.

    Luv u from Minnesota. xx
    My Inner Chick recently wrote…Christian Grey Meets Mrs. RobinsonMy Profile

  • February 21, 2015 Elaine A.

    Honestly, I can respect someone’s opinion to say “leave your kids off the internet” but I never thought you were seeking attention, I thought you were simply putting the thoughts out there. We do fully NOT know how all this online stuff is going to affect this generation of kids but I believe if we keep things in a positive and beautiful light it will all be okay.

    Sorry you’re feelings were hurt and sorry people felt the need to react that way. That party I DO NOT get.

    xo

  • February 24, 2015 Linda Roy

    Oh, I’ve felt this pain! 😉 What a great take on the prompt, and I love the abstract quality of it.
    Linda Roy recently wrote…Laugh InMy Profile

  • February 26, 2015 Natalie

    It’s so hard to put yourself out there because of the naysayers…and I’m glad you will continue to speak your truth!

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