The Mother I Am

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“I believe that we don’t choose our stories,” she began, leaning forward. “Our stories choose us.” She paused and took a sip of water. Her hand, I noticed was steady. “And if we don’t tell them, then we are somehow diminished.”
– Dani Shapiro, Still Writing: The Perils and Pleasures of a Creative Life

It’s natural I believe, to not want to be diminished in any way, especially if we grew up feeling small, even invisible. If it’s possible to disappear, you will. 

I haven’t told many stories about my childhood, and how I felt growing up. Part of the reason is because my memory is shocking – shockingly poor. I remember fragments, moments, bits and pieces. The other reason is because I was afraid. A story has been clawing itself out of me for a while now. Years. You could say it’s the start of a very big, long story, the foundation of who I am. 

Today, I share that story at Mamalode. It is with some trepidation, putting out those 800 plus words into the world. I don’t know what the consequences will be personally. Whatever they may be, I suppose I will have to steel myself and wait for it. The story is out there now. 

I will not be diminished anymore. 

I would love for you to read it. Thank you.

3_WH_TheMotherIAm_Lee

Image courtesy of Mamalode

 

Alison
Alison Lee is a former PR and marketing professional turned work-at-home mother. After a 10-year career in various PR agencies, and of the world’s biggest sports brands, Alison traded in product launches and world travel, for sippy cups, diapers, and breastfeeding. Alison's writing has been featured on Mamalode, On Parenting at The Washington Post, The Huffington Post, Everyday Family, Scary Mommy, and DrGreene.com. She is one of 35 essayists in the anthology, My Other Ex: Women’s True Stories of Leaving and Losing Friends. In 2012, she founded Little Love Media, a social media consultancy specializing in blog book tours, and because she doesn’t sleep, is an editor at BonBon Break, an online magazine. Alison lives in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia with her husband and four children (two boys and boy/ girl twins).
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