Today’s RemembeRED prompt from The Red Dress Club asks us to write something about ourselves of which we are proud.
I am Chinese. I’m stating the obvious because I need to set the stage for this post. In Chinese culture, pride is not the virtue that you tell your children they must have. In fact, it’s the opposite. Humility is the preferred quality.
Humility, as defined by Wikipedia is the quality of being modest, reverential, even politely submissive. People who know me will laugh at this. I’m not known to be ‘modest’ in any way, nor ‘reverential’ and I’m wildly the opposite of submissive. That, however, does not mean I’m proud.
I still have the inability to stand up and say I’m proud of myself or my achievements. In fact, when I saw this prompt, my first thought was, I’ll have nothing to write about. What have I done that I should be so proud about?
The most obvious answer would be my new-ish role as a mother. Right?
My Chinese side reminds me that my 16 month old son is still breastfeeding, not weaned. Still co-sleeping, not in his own crib. Before you attachment parenting types come out and bash me with a stick, let me hasten to say, I do not think having a toddler who is still nursing and co-sleeping is a bad thing. It’s FAR from that. However, it does mean that my original goals of weaning and independent sleeping by 12 months have not been reached. My Chinese side tells me that there’s nothing to be proud of.
This is the part where you can come in and give me a good kick up my you-know-what.
Yes, again, please.
Now that you’ve got that out of your system, I will hereby proclaim that I am indeed proud of myself as a mother.
I carried him for 9 months.
I gave up my career to stay home with him (mind you, I was happy to quit).
I birthed him (and nearly bled to death, but that’s another post for another day).
My son is strong and healthy (hey, all that breast milk!).
He is sweet and affectionate.
He is happy.
He is smart.
He is funny.
He is MINE.